Unhappily married men who whine are boring

So I went out to a birthday party last night. My friend Shaan was celebrating her fiance’s birthday at a little joint not far from my house. She squealed when I got there, which hurt my ears but made me feel really important, and I was welcomed like an old friend. She introduced me to all her friends, including one gentleman whose name I’ve forgotten, but whose conversation I unfortunately have not.

Unhappily married for the past five years, this person complained about this, that and the other with a discontented pout on his at least 40-year-old face. Me being the die hard romantic that I am, I tried to throw in a few props for the institution, you know, discuss the pros as opposed to the cons.

I mention the ideal, marrying for love. How else, I say, will you find the energy and desire to do the rest of the work that a good marriage is likely to require?

He sneers at me. “You are so traditional.”

Since when did traditional become a bad thing? The way he said it you’d have thought the word was on par with whore or incurable disease. And get this, I find out later this person married for money.

What could be more traditional than that?

I’m not positive, but I’m pretty sure more people marry for money than they do for love. I’d venture to say the latter is a fairly new concept, given the practicalities that surrounded most early unions.

If you marry for money, you marry for money. Go out and spend it! Don’t bitch to me and say inappropriate things because you’re stupid, miserable and not smart enough to make the best of your situation or get out of it.

Thank God for romance novels and every writer out there who believes in happy endings, on and off the page. If that rather squallid conversation had been part of the intro to a romance novel, the hero and heroine would have taken a long vacation, fallen back in love on a sandy beach, fought over  gelato flavors and revealed all their angst and love on a balcony with a warm breeze blowing.

Love stories like that…


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